


I'm Not That Girl (Or am I)

by conehead



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-26 12:26:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10786731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conehead/pseuds/conehead
Summary: Lexa is a hopeless gay when it comes to Clarke Griffin, something that Anya is always quick to remind her of.Basically, Lexa auditions for the school musical and can't help it if the songs have more meaning than intended and are directed at a certain blonde.Just a fluffly one-shot around the musical Wicked and a relentlessly teasing Anya





	I'm Not That Girl (Or am I)

“You should audition, you have an annoyingly good voice and maybe that’ll be your chance to get to know blondie.” Anya says as they watch Clarke and Raven put up announcements for the upcoming musical.

 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

“No? So you aren’t currently crushing on a girl whose name starts with C and rhymes with shark?” Anya jibes.

 

“Nope and regardless, you know I don’t do crowds. I still don’t know why you joined the crew. You hate doing what people tell you and working with others.”

 

“Both still true, but Raven’s doing lighting and sounds so it was the only way to spend more time together.”

 

“And you call me a sap?”

 

“At least I actually got the girl and don’t pine after her, like an idiot.”

 

“Shut up.” She grumbles

 

After many attempts to bribe her into auditioning, Anya finally just drags Lexa down to the auditorium and shoves her on stage.

 

“Ah, Lexa, you’re right on time. I have to say I was surprised when I saw your name on the roster but I’m pleased you’re here.” Marcus Kane, the school’s drama teacher addresses her. He really does have every reason to be surprised, she’s never expressed any interest in the class and only speaks up when called on. “Now if you’re ready, we’ll go right in with your song before we do any script work.”

 

She mentally curses Anya for apparently singing her up, knowing Lexa would never be able to back out or say it was a misunderstanding. She can only hope Anya put a song she knows all of the words to. When she hears the music start she relaxes a little but at the same time can’t help but roll her eyes at Anya. Of course it’s the Beatles "I Want To Hold Your Hand", Anya always had to have the last laugh.   
  


She starts off strong and is almost finished with the first verse when the auditorium doors open and there in all her glory is Clarke Griffin. Lexa’s pretty sure her heart stops and she probably fumbled the next line. But there is the girl she can never stop thinking about, dressed in short flowy summer dress that somehow accentuates all of her best features. Which if Lexa’s honest with herself there isn’t a bad feature to be seen on Clarke, but it doesn’t help her poor gay heart.

 

Somehow she manages to pull herself together for the next verse, just in time to see Bellamy Blake walk in and sit next to Clarke. He whispers something in her ear and she watches the blonde’s head fall back in silent laughter. Okay, pull it together Lexa. Oh how she tries to not let the next verse get her, but she doesn’t take her eyes off of the pair while she sings.

 

_ Oh please, say to me _ __  
_ You'll let me be your man _ __  
_ And please, say to me _ __  
_ You'll let me hold your hand  _ __  
_ You let me hold your hand _ _  
_ __ I wanna hold your hand      She can only imagine how soft they would be.

 

She finishes and finally looks over to the table where Marcus and the other ‘producers’ are seated to see large grins on their faces and they gesture for her to come off stage. She walks behind the curtain where she runs into Anya.

 

“I can’t believe you made me do that.” Lexa hisses out.

 

“Oh my god that was amazing. That was the gayest thing I've ever seen!” Anya barely makes out through her laughter.

 

“Shut up” She scolds before making her way to the floor with Anya following close behind.

 

“I think we’ve found our Elphaba! We simply we need to do a vocal chemistry test and then some dialogue. We’ll let you look over the piece and then you and Clarke will be singing together before running some lines.” Marcus says happily, handing her a packet before walking off to talk to the other drama heads.

 

“Hey Lexa!” a cheery voice says making her turn around to face none other than Clarke who is beaming at her. “I didn't know you had such a great voice, you killed that song” It takes her an embarrassing amount of time to register the words, because she’s too busy taking Clarke in.

 

“H-hi Clarke, you too. I mean you have a really nice voice, but everyone already knew that and even though I didn't hear your audition I'm sure you uh killed that too” She mentally scolds herself for her blubbering and kicks Anya when she hears “ _ so gay _ ” next to her, whispering a low but serious “ _ Shut up”. _

 

Clarke just watches the exchange with curious amusement but doesn’t comment on anything. Lexa finally manages to look down at the bundled papers in her hands and swears her eyes popped out of her head. 

 

“Wh-Why are we singing a love song?” Lexa asks but it comes out as more of a squeak. “Aren't there other duets that would work for this?” she questions with a little more composure.

 

“Sure, but this one has similar notes and is well known so you don't have to learn a new song!” Clarke brushes this off like it’s no big deal. Like it’s the simplest explanation and solutions possible. God, she has to sing a love song to- No! with Clarke Griffin. May her poor gay heart keep beating long enough for her to get through this. Oh how Anya was going to pay for this

 

\-----

 

Somehow she’s managed to survive three more weeks of close proximity to Clarke and relentless teasing from Anya. Lexa is staying after school again to do a run through of one of her solos. She still hasn’t gotten used to the fact that she’s not only in a musical, but is also one of the leads. She’s standing stage right, while stage left is being overrun by set material and props. Anya is currently smirking at her while painting bricks onto cardboard. Behind Anya, Clarke and Bellamy are standing with...someone she has yet to remember the name of, but they’re waiting for it to be their turn wow everybody. 

 

The first few bars of "I'm Not That Girl" pulls her focus back and she takes a few deep breathes to calm her racing heart. It’s a soft song and she manages to pour all of her emotion into it. It isn’t until the fourth verse that her attention is torn away. Towards the smiling blonde that makes her heart flutter and the boy with his hand on her that makes her stomach fall.

 

**_Blithe smile, lithe limb_ ** ****__  
**_She who's winsome, she wins him_ ** __ -Of course she chose him, why would she want Lexa anyway __  
**_Gold hair with a gentle curl_ ** _  - _ more of a wave really, but so flowy and golden __  
**_That's the girl I-he chose_ ** _ \-  _ she mentally berates herself for the partial slip and has to keep her focus for the rest of the song so it doesn't happen again   
**_And Heaven knows_ ** **_  
_ ** ****_I'm not that girl_ __ \-   oh how she wishes she was though

**_Don't wish, don't start_ ** ****__  
**_Wishing only wounds the heart_ ** ****__  
**_I wasn't born for the rose and the pearl_ ** ****__  
**_There's a girl I know_ ** ****__  
**_He loves her so_ ** **_  
_ ** ****_I'm not that girl…_

 

She waits until she sees Marcus nod at her before she walks over to stage left.

 

“It's funny, your character pining after the blonde’s boyfriend when really you're pining after the blonde herself” Of course Anya can’t go a minute without making fun of her. She should really expect it, but one can only hope for mature friends.

 

“Shut up”

 

Unfortunately she has to wait around. That’s the downside of being a lead, almost every song has her in it. She watches Clarke and Bellamy sing together and has to quell her jealousy. She watches Octavia and Lincoln do their quick portion to test the sound and smiles at how well they fit together. And then it’s her turn again, well her and Clarke’s. They’re ending the day with “What is this feeling” and then Lexa can go crawl under her covers and forget about Clarke.

 

But oh how when they start singing together and their voices compliment each other and Clarke just looks so beautiful. Oh how Lexa wished that they were singing a different L word instead of loathing. She could never loathe Clarke, well except maybe for making her feel this way, but she knew anything else was out of the question.

 

They finish with only one restart and Lexa hastily tries to gather all of her stuff to get home, when Anya corners her.

 

“We’re going to a party.”

 

“I don’t do parties.” Lexa says, while trying to free herself from her friends unrelenting grasp.

 

“It’s more of a get together, for the cast and crew to mingle before everything gets stressful. Come on it’s Clarke’s house, don’t you want to see where she lives?” Anya smirks.

 

“I’m not a creep.” Lexa grumbles, taking little offense to the implication.

 

“Still, you’re a lead. You have to be there.”

 

“Fine.” She relents.”But I’m not staying long.”

 

“Yeah yeah, I won’t keep you from your squid documentary.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

\---

 

She’s been there ten minutes and she’s already ready to go. Lexa doesn’t do crowds, even if she knows the majority of the people there, she doesn’t feel comfortable enough to interact with them.

 

The only good thing that’s happened is finding out that Bellamy was in fact dating someone else. As evident by the brunette currently draped over him. Who Lexa finds out is his girlfriend Echo, a freshman in college, so therefore she wouldn’t have seen her around school.

 

“Lexa!” She turns to see Octavia coming towards her. “Come on, there’s something you have to see in the basement!” Octavia grabs her hand and drags her through the house and down the stairs where the majority of the people seem to already be gathered around a small open space.

 

“Ladies and gentledudes” Raven begins, swaying slightly “my gal pal and I have a little performance for you all. It's a little remake of a Octavia and Lincoln’s portion of the dancing through life song you all know so well by now, with name changes and I hope you enjoy.” She gives a bow before winking at Lexa. 

  
Raven walks over to the karaoke machine and grabs two microphones, handing one to Anya before beginning. “Listen, Lexa” Which causes Lexa to pause and furrow her brow trying to figure out what her friends were doing.   
  
“Yes?” Anya asks as she turns around, hand on her chest while battering her eyes. The dramatics cause Lexa’s own eyes to roll.   
  
“Uh, Lexa   
I've got something to confess, a   
Reason why, well-    
Why I asked you here tonight” Raven starts back up, fidgeting around Anya and if Lexa wasn't still trying to figure out what they were up to she’d commend the girls acting skills    
“Now I know it isn't fair…”   
  
“Oh, Clarke. I know why.” Anya sighs out, turning away again.   
  
“You do?” Raven asks with perfected confusion. To which Anya nods.   
  
“It's because of my unruly hair    
And you felt sorry for me    
Well isn't that right?” Anya huffs out and Lexa’s cheeks flush red.   
  
“No! no! It's because..uh..because...   
Because you are so beautiful”   
  
“Oh, Clarke!” Anya exclaims. “I think you're wonderful!    
And we deserve each other    
Don't you see, this is our chance?    
We deserve each other    
Don't we, Clarke?”   
  
That's when Raven breaks character breathing out a  _ god yes _ before slamming her and Anyas lips together.  But Lexa isn't there to see that, having left before she could be embarrassed any further. She can’t believe Anya would do something like that. It’s gone too far and now she’ll never be able to show her face again. 

 

If she had even bothered to look around she would have seen Clarke’s equally red blush and glare sent Raven’s way.

 

When Clarke goes to look for Lexa she sees a slumped over figure on the patio. Quietly opening and closing the door behind her to not startle the girl she takes a seat next to her.   
  


“Raven can be a bit of an ass sometimes.”

 

“Yeah, Anya’s the same way.” Lexa answers without looking over at the blonde.

 

“You have to admit it was creative though.” Clarke says and Lexa attempts not to scoff at that, because her best friend just embarrassed her and basically told everyone her feelings for Clarke.

 

“Are you ever going to ask me out or are you going to just keep indirectly singing me songs?” Clarke tries again and Lexa’s pretty sure her heart stopped.

 

“Wh-what?”

 

“Oh were you singing about someone else? I’ve never seen such emotion before.” 

 

“No! I mean. They were just songs.” Lexa attempts to sound calm but nothing about her is calm right now.

 

“Ah my mistake then.” Clarke says before turning around to head back inside and Lexa misses the quick flicker of disappointment that passes over her face.

 

Did that really just happen? Did Clarke really know how she felt. Lexa’s brain was running in circles trying to connect everything, she barely remembered Clarke bringing up a date. That had to be a joke. Surely Clarke was just teasing her, right? She didn’t want to make a fool out of herself by asking, but some part of her wanted to know.

 

“Clarke?” She calls tentatively.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Um, would you have said yes?”  She hates how small she sounds, but loves the way Clarke’s face scrunches up in confusion.

 

“To what?”

 

“Well, uh. To a date. A date with me.” Of course she wouldn’t, who would want to go on a date with someone who can’t even form a proper sentence?

 

“God you’re too much” She barely registers the response before there’s a hand on her neck and soft pink lips are on hers and Lexa’s pretty sure her brain short circuited. It took her a few moments before she pulled herself together enough to reciprocate, but then the kiss was over. Too soon in her opinion. And she opened her eyes to see soft, amused blue ones.

 

“I would have said yes.”

 

“Really?” Lexa asks in disbelief

 

“I did just kiss you didn’t I?” Clarke asks with a quirk of her eyebrow.

 

“Well yeah but-” she shakes her head, pull it together. “Will you?”

 

“What, kiss you?”

 

“No! Wait, I mean yes, yes that too but um go on a date.” She says before tacking on the “with me” because none of this feels real and she feels the need to clarify it again.

 

“Yes. God, Anya was right, you are gay mess.”

 

Excitement temporarily blocking out annoyance of Anya and the fact that she had apparently been talking to Clarke about her she feels a new surge of confidence.

 

“Shut up” she mumbles before bringing their lips together again.

  
  
  



End file.
